I have been thinking how to write about mother's day this year. While I love my mother and think she us above any other that could possibly be found out there, I found myself sneaking away to take moments. I know how selfish that sounds. But if I'm going to be honest to myself and to what a write here, I need to share how there were hard moments. Small things that were said; that met nothing to people around and normally would mean nothing to me. No worries, I wasn't some dork sulking in a corner. There were only a few times I slipped away and I'm sure no one even noticed. Which in my opinion is a good thing. I just needed a few times to gather myself. And remember how lucky I am to have the mother I have. After I lost the baby my mom said "I can't understand how this feels for you, but I know when one finally makes it to you; this experience will make it that much sweeter.". I know she's right. I love mine and am so grateful for her. And for those of you wondering, no we are not planning on one any time soon. We want to focus on the new house and getting things together. Just take time would be the best way to put it, I think.
Jon was so sweet. He had a gift waiting for me Mother's Day morning. It was a willow tree figurine with a woman holding a baby. You may think this would be a sad reminder, but then he said he thought the title was perfect. And it was. "Angel of Mine". Just perfect.

Under the title it reads "So loved, so very loved."

I have a sister that is a doll, she is always sending me little notes or quotes when she finds ones she thinks I might like. She sent me this poem for Mother's day. It really touched me, so I'm going to leave you all with it. Thanks Ariell. Love you.
Am I Not A Mother?
by Gail Fasolo
Am I not a mother
On this Mother's Day?
I had a baby, but she's gone.
Death took her away.
Hopes and dreams have vanished
a happy time turned cold.
My motherhood-where is it now?
Gone? Or put on hold?
Am I not a mother
even though my child died?
Does anyone know my heartbreak
or the anguish felt inside?
Special gifts and flowers
but who'll remember me?
As I stand and shed some tears
at your graveside where I'll be.
Mother's Day-so painful
but I will make it through.
Yes, I am a mother!
but God takes care of you.
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